~ Reflection on Looking Back to Go Forward ~
At this time of year, it’s customary to look back at the year that’s just ended and to look forward to the next one. Indeed, looking back to go forward is an ancient tradition. In Roman times, Janus was the God of beginnings, gates, doorways, transitions, passages, and endings. He is usually depicted as having two faces, because he looks back to the past and forward to the future. The Romans named the month of January in his honor.
As a generalization, Buddhism is more about being in the present moment and accepting whatever is happening in the now. It tends to avoid dwelling in the past or projecting into the future. However, the Buddha himself did not discourage reflection. Indeed, there is a story about the Buddha offering his son, Rahula, advice on the subject. Apparently, the Buddha asked his son what a mirror is used for and he replied that it is for reflecting. The Buddha then said:
“In the same way, Rahula, bodily action should be done with reflection and consideration; verbal action should be done with reflection and consideration; mental action should be done with reflection and consideration.”
He went on:
“Purify bodily action through repeated consideration and review; purify verbal action through repeated consideration and review; purify mental action through repeated consideration and review.”
So I invite you to take some time to reflect back on your life over the past year. Much of the time, we go through life at a breakneck pace, seldom taking time to contemplate our actions, words and thoughts. And even if we do, we don’t often take the next step of identifying the assumptions and expectations that shape them, and we hardly ever try to change the habitual patterns that arise from them. If we want change our habitual patterns, we need to reflect on our actions, words and thoughts, as well as the assumptions and expectations that influence them.
The mind is extremely skilled at gathering, storing and analyzing information. It then uses this information at a later date. This means the mind is conditioned by the past, and that it will try to re-create what it knows and is familiar with, even if it is painful. This means we are always operating from outdated assumptions and expectations.
Our beliefs about life may have passed their sell-by date and no longer serve us or others, but if we don’t reflect on them, we will not be able to change them. We will just continue to blindly follow our conditioning. So pausing to reflect on our lives is necessary, if we want to learn and change.
You might start a reflection on the past year by finding a quiet place where you will not be disturbed. Then closing your eyes and turning your attention inside to the inner landscape of your body, mind and heart. Taking a few deep, relaxing breaths and then letting the breath return to its natural rhythm. When your mind quietens down and you feel calm and peaceful, imagine your mind as a very still pond. The water is deep and motionless. Settled and tranquil.
Then considering the past year, reflect on the following questions:
Slowly and deliberately drop these questions – one at a time - into the pond of your mind, just as you might drop a handful of pebbles one at a time. Then observe what happens. This is not about searching for answers. Rather it’s about watching for any ripples on the surface of the water and noticing if anything emerges from the depths of your being.
In this way, we can start to identify the patterns in our minds, detaching from the unhelpful ones and cultivating the beneficial ones. In other words, we can follow the Buddha’s advice and purify our minds. This isn’t always easy because the mind is attached to its habits and will try to return to its default mode, which feels more familiar and comfortable. However, with persistence, we can change the habits that no longer serve us.
As this can be difficult, please be gentle with yourself because you are quite literally changing your mind. The assumptions and expectations that underlie our actions, words and thoughts have built up over a lifetime, so they are unlikely to loosen their grip easily or quickly. But with patience and gentleness, we can change over time.
As a generalization, Buddhism is more about being in the present moment and accepting whatever is happening in the now. It tends to avoid dwelling in the past or projecting into the future. However, the Buddha himself did not discourage reflection. Indeed, there is a story about the Buddha offering his son, Rahula, advice on the subject. Apparently, the Buddha asked his son what a mirror is used for and he replied that it is for reflecting. The Buddha then said:
“In the same way, Rahula, bodily action should be done with reflection and consideration; verbal action should be done with reflection and consideration; mental action should be done with reflection and consideration.”
He went on:
“Purify bodily action through repeated consideration and review; purify verbal action through repeated consideration and review; purify mental action through repeated consideration and review.”
So I invite you to take some time to reflect back on your life over the past year. Much of the time, we go through life at a breakneck pace, seldom taking time to contemplate our actions, words and thoughts. And even if we do, we don’t often take the next step of identifying the assumptions and expectations that shape them, and we hardly ever try to change the habitual patterns that arise from them. If we want change our habitual patterns, we need to reflect on our actions, words and thoughts, as well as the assumptions and expectations that influence them.
The mind is extremely skilled at gathering, storing and analyzing information. It then uses this information at a later date. This means the mind is conditioned by the past, and that it will try to re-create what it knows and is familiar with, even if it is painful. This means we are always operating from outdated assumptions and expectations.
Our beliefs about life may have passed their sell-by date and no longer serve us or others, but if we don’t reflect on them, we will not be able to change them. We will just continue to blindly follow our conditioning. So pausing to reflect on our lives is necessary, if we want to learn and change.
You might start a reflection on the past year by finding a quiet place where you will not be disturbed. Then closing your eyes and turning your attention inside to the inner landscape of your body, mind and heart. Taking a few deep, relaxing breaths and then letting the breath return to its natural rhythm. When your mind quietens down and you feel calm and peaceful, imagine your mind as a very still pond. The water is deep and motionless. Settled and tranquil.
Then considering the past year, reflect on the following questions:
- What situations did I find the most challenging?
- What did I do, say and think about these situations or events?
- What were the assumptions and expectations that made me to react in this way?
- Were they harmful to me or others, or were they beneficial?
- If they were harmful, how might I modify or adjust my assumptions and expectations to be more beneficial next time I am in a similar situation?
Slowly and deliberately drop these questions – one at a time - into the pond of your mind, just as you might drop a handful of pebbles one at a time. Then observe what happens. This is not about searching for answers. Rather it’s about watching for any ripples on the surface of the water and noticing if anything emerges from the depths of your being.
In this way, we can start to identify the patterns in our minds, detaching from the unhelpful ones and cultivating the beneficial ones. In other words, we can follow the Buddha’s advice and purify our minds. This isn’t always easy because the mind is attached to its habits and will try to return to its default mode, which feels more familiar and comfortable. However, with persistence, we can change the habits that no longer serve us.
As this can be difficult, please be gentle with yourself because you are quite literally changing your mind. The assumptions and expectations that underlie our actions, words and thoughts have built up over a lifetime, so they are unlikely to loosen their grip easily or quickly. But with patience and gentleness, we can change over time.