~ Five Simple Strategies for Being with Fear ~
There is a lot of fear around these days. The fear of contracting the delta variant of COVID19, the fear of climate disruption, the fear of loneliness, the fear of being with other people, the fear of loosing one's job or home, the fear of not having enough money to pay the bills, and so on. I know I feel fear. But fear is OK. It’s only natural to feel afraid with everything that’s going on. Fear is an instinctive response to danger. It has an intelligence and we can think of it as nature’s protector.
But usually we think there’s something wrong with fear. It is unpleasant and so we often try to get rid of it by repressing it or distracting ourselves from it. But in my experience, these strategies don’t work for long, and I end up feeling more afraid. I get caught up in it and overwhelmed by it. Fear takes over my mind and I lose any sense of perspective. I also lose touch with love, happiness, joy, and a sense of humor.
Fear as contagious as the delta variant, if not more so. So I encourage you to be aware of your thoughts and emotions, especially fear, and to hold them with mindfulness and gentleness - neither indulging them or repressing them.
To work with fear, it’s very helpful to calm down the nervous system and relax. With a little effort and some patience, we can regulate strong emotions, like fear. Here are five simple ways to do this. You can try these separately or combine two or more together:
Breath meditation: Start by taking a few long, deep breaths, noticing the sensations of the inhale and the exhale, wherever you feel them the most easily. This may be at the tip of your nostrils, the back of your throat, or the rise and fall of your chest or abdomen. Then letting the breath return to its natural rhythm, still being aware of the sensations of breathing. If your awareness wanders away from the sensations of breathing, gently bring it back without any judgement or blame. If noticing the sensations of breathing doesn’t work for you, try using the sensations in your hands, feet or face as a meditation anchor instead.
Sensory awareness: Let your awareness rest on your senses. This naturally regulates strong emotions. Notice what you can actually see and hear, as well as how things feel when you touch them. Notice warmth and coolness, hardness and softness, heaviness and lightness. Feel the force of gravity on your body. Use your senses to ground yourself. For example, what does it feel like to sit in a chair, walk, feel your clothes on your body. See if you can focus on the direct experience itself rather than what you think about it.
Saying some comforting phrases to yourself: When you experience fear or other strong emotions, it can be helpful to say some comforting phrases silently to yourself, such as “This too”, “I can hold this”, “It’s alright”, and “It’s OK”. It can also be helpful to put your hand on your heart or cheek, as you say these phrases.
Physical movement: Almost any form of intentional physical movement can help to reduce fear. You could try walking, shaking, stretching, exercising, dance, yoga, or qigong. Physical movement helps to discharge energy by loosening and relaxing the body.
Being in a peaceful natural setting: This is my “go-to” strategy for calming down. Sometimes, I just look outside my window and it is enough to settle and relax me. Of course, you can also be more active and go for a walk, although it doesn’t need to be long or energetic. Being in peaceful, natural settings is scientifically proven to reduce stress, anxiety, and depression, as well as boost the immune system.
I sincerely hope these five strategies are useful and help you to calm down your nervous system and relax.
I’ll close with a few words from the author Hermann Hesse who said: “Within you, there is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat at any time and be yourself.” Go there as often as you can.
But usually we think there’s something wrong with fear. It is unpleasant and so we often try to get rid of it by repressing it or distracting ourselves from it. But in my experience, these strategies don’t work for long, and I end up feeling more afraid. I get caught up in it and overwhelmed by it. Fear takes over my mind and I lose any sense of perspective. I also lose touch with love, happiness, joy, and a sense of humor.
Fear as contagious as the delta variant, if not more so. So I encourage you to be aware of your thoughts and emotions, especially fear, and to hold them with mindfulness and gentleness - neither indulging them or repressing them.
To work with fear, it’s very helpful to calm down the nervous system and relax. With a little effort and some patience, we can regulate strong emotions, like fear. Here are five simple ways to do this. You can try these separately or combine two or more together:
Breath meditation: Start by taking a few long, deep breaths, noticing the sensations of the inhale and the exhale, wherever you feel them the most easily. This may be at the tip of your nostrils, the back of your throat, or the rise and fall of your chest or abdomen. Then letting the breath return to its natural rhythm, still being aware of the sensations of breathing. If your awareness wanders away from the sensations of breathing, gently bring it back without any judgement or blame. If noticing the sensations of breathing doesn’t work for you, try using the sensations in your hands, feet or face as a meditation anchor instead.
Sensory awareness: Let your awareness rest on your senses. This naturally regulates strong emotions. Notice what you can actually see and hear, as well as how things feel when you touch them. Notice warmth and coolness, hardness and softness, heaviness and lightness. Feel the force of gravity on your body. Use your senses to ground yourself. For example, what does it feel like to sit in a chair, walk, feel your clothes on your body. See if you can focus on the direct experience itself rather than what you think about it.
Saying some comforting phrases to yourself: When you experience fear or other strong emotions, it can be helpful to say some comforting phrases silently to yourself, such as “This too”, “I can hold this”, “It’s alright”, and “It’s OK”. It can also be helpful to put your hand on your heart or cheek, as you say these phrases.
Physical movement: Almost any form of intentional physical movement can help to reduce fear. You could try walking, shaking, stretching, exercising, dance, yoga, or qigong. Physical movement helps to discharge energy by loosening and relaxing the body.
Being in a peaceful natural setting: This is my “go-to” strategy for calming down. Sometimes, I just look outside my window and it is enough to settle and relax me. Of course, you can also be more active and go for a walk, although it doesn’t need to be long or energetic. Being in peaceful, natural settings is scientifically proven to reduce stress, anxiety, and depression, as well as boost the immune system.
I sincerely hope these five strategies are useful and help you to calm down your nervous system and relax.
I’ll close with a few words from the author Hermann Hesse who said: “Within you, there is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat at any time and be yourself.” Go there as often as you can.